We suppose it's a sport

Young man with plank affixed to feet wins golden donut.

Over in Italy, Shaun White, a red-headed youth with much "vert" and tremendous
(you've got to provide your own snowboarding term here, after "vert" we're pretty much spent) won the gold medal in half-piping on a snowboard, or some such. Dish is proud of the Soaring Squash. Dish has come up with a list of tricks with equally silly names as the "Air to Fakie" and the "Nose Grabe with Tail Poke" that we'd like to see him perform at the 2010 Winter Olympics, slated for Seven Springs, oddly enough, in 2008.

Here they be:

The Latvian Clambake
The Dangerous Flip of Crippling Existential Despair
The Limping Bellhop
Somewhat Spasmodic 1,280 Degree Danse Macabre
The Grand Groin Grab
Monkey Aware of Vacuity McTwisty
The "Sorry, I Didn't Know That Was Your Mom" Backpedal
Hast Thou a Sandwich?
Oooh, That's Flippy!
Taking Liberties With the Cabana Boy