Pittsburgh Dish

We have lost our minds

Allegheny General Hospital cafeteria menu becomes Steelers fight song.

Nothing that can be said here will prepare Dish readers for what they hear after they dial the following digits: 412-359-4223. Yes, the rhymes are forced and a bit awkward. Yes, this recording seems unlikely to play any role in propelling the Steelers to victory Sunday. And, yes, whoever decided to do this would probably be better served as an inpatient at Western Psych than as an AGH cafeteria employee. Nevertheless, Dish concludes that what you will hear is profound, spiritual and, perhaps, the most wonderful thing ever created anywhere by man, animal or deity.

Love Us or Rebus, Part II

+knuckleheads +crackpots =Pittsburgh Dish.

Some people love Dish. They know that they will find Dish by typing in www.pittsburghdish.com. That's what many people do when the want to find Dish, they type that www thing into the browserdoohickey and, bingo, Dish. The same probably goes for those who hate Dish.

But then there are those who don't know Dish. All they want to do is find out if Jeff Reed is gay, or something like that. So they Google, Dogpile and Yahoo. And, by some inexplicable confluence of intent, fate and happenstance, they click on a search result and, behold, Dish!

What follows is a partial list of sublimely absurd paths taken to Dish. Which goes to show, it's not so much the journey that counts, it's getting to your destination; whether you knew that's where you were headed or not.

On with the funny:

Minnesota Vikings charity work since cruise boat

"I hate the Patriots" (twice, two months apart)

Sidney Crosby lady spending the night

"Pittsburgh Women" +"sex groups"

"Paul McGuire" + "Joe Theisman" worst ever

"Paul McGuire" + "Joe Theisman" suck

"Bill Cowher sucks"

Mr. Clean Dish ads

"aluminum bottles making bar fights safer"

Pittsburgh crab legs all you can eat

How did Andy Warhol die?

Maddox flux capacitator

crew team initiation

"exposed thongs"

cleavage

Cruising Pittsburgh bathrooms

Mellon Arena beer prices

Schaefer beer

head shop on Carson St.

Where to buy weed in Pittsburgh

Post-Election Caption Contest

Parade your pith neath this pic taken next to a polling place near Dish HQ. The winner will receive something. Probably a beer. Either email us your prose or post in the comments section. Try not to cuss. Just try.

Good luck.

Breaking News: Gays and lesbians watch all sorts of TV shows

New network, HeteroTV, in the works.

From the New York Post:

WHAT do gay people watch?

Well, now we know — surprisingly — that they like "South Park" every bit as much "Queer Eye for the Straight Guy."

A new study by Simmons Market Research on the media habits of 19,000 gay and lesbian adults over the last year found that gay viewers do not always match up to stereotypes.

For instance, "South Park" ranks right behind "Queer Eye," with about 25 percent of gay men and lesbians saying they watched it in the past four weeks, compared to eight percent of the total population.

Lesbians, it turns out, watch "Law & Order: SVU," "Golden Girls" reruns on Lifetime and Spike TV's "Real TV" in far greater numbers than the general population, the study found.

On cable, gay men are most likely to watch — in this order — Comedy Central, Discovery, Spike TV, A&E, Bravo, Sci Fi, CNN, Lifetime, Fox News Channel and HGTV, it said.

Gay women show distinct preferences for pay-cable channels. In order, they said they watched HBO, A&E, USA, ESPN, Discovery, Lifetime, Showtime, Bravo, TNT and Starz, a premium movie channel. — Post staff writer

Wood fixes willie in Newfoundland

Dish is tending to Dish business today (i.e. begging people for ads, hiring sales reps, feeding the cat) but we felt it our duty to leave you with this.

The Willie Stargell statue at PNC Park will never look the same.

(P.S. If you'd like to sell ads for on a commission basis, please contact editor@pittsburghdish.com. You must be over 21, have a valid driver's license and like to drink beer.)